What is sexual assault? It is any forced sexual activity that is against a person’s will. The force may come in the form of actual physical force, or it may be mental and emotional pressures, coercion or manipulation.

Who are the victims? Anyone can be sexually assaulted; however, the vast majority of victims are female. Women are victimized throughout every level of society regardless of age, race, appearance or social standing.

Sexual assault is not "just a woman’s problem," but is a tragedy for all. In the aftermath, the victim experiences fear, pain, confusion, anger, isolation, and a desperate struggle to reclaim a normal life. To varying degrees, these hardships are also shared by all those who love, care for, work with, or are otherwise associated with the victim.

Who are the assailants? The vast majority of assailants are male. Like their victims, they also come from all areas of society regardless of age, race, appearance, or social standing. There is no practical or easy guide for you to use that can accurately predict who may or may not commit sexual assault against you, if given the opportunity.

Dates and Acquaintances

More than one-half of all reported sexual assaults occur in a residence, usually that of the victim. More than one-half of all reported sexual assaults involve an attack by an acquaintance – someone known to the victim. So, while attacks by strangers do occur both at and away from home, women are more often assaulted by someone they are acquainted with and have allowed entry to their residence.

Dates

There are some basic strategies a woman can use to help make herself less vulnerable to sexual assault while dating:

• Know the person you are dating. If you don’t know him well, stay in public areas near other people.
• If you are out with someone in whom you haven’t developed complete trust, make sure someone you do trust knows where you are going and how long you expect to be gone. Make it obvious to your date that you are being monitored.
• Realize that you do not have to accept any unwanted sexual attention while dating. You have the right to set you own sexual limits, and these limits may change over time or with different people.
• Learn to communicate clearly what you want and what your limits are.
• Be assertive. Act immediately when something happens that you do not like. Stand up for your personal rights.
• Trust your feelings. If you are being pressured or made to feel uncomfortable, view that relationship with extra caution.
• Be cautious with all relationships, but be especially cautious with anyone who is domineering or manipulative and attempts to impose his will on you, or shows a lack of respect for your feelings.
• Limit the use of alcohol and drugs. They reduce your ability to think clearly and make good decisions.

Acquaintances

Don’t trust acquaintances too readily! As far as safety consideration are concerned, acquaintances should be treated as you would a stranger until such time as earned trust can be established. It is neither rude nor offensive to treat this person with extra caution. On the contrary, it is being smart and safety conscious. Being cautious reduces your risk of being assaulted, and prevents opportunities for sexual assault to occur.

Strangers

Sexual assault by strangers actually occurs less often than by acquaintances. This is because we naturally treat strangers with more caution. Generally they are given less opportunity, because we are much less likely to trust them and allow ourselves to be isolated with them.

Prevention at Home

Home can provide ready-made privacy and isolation for an attacker. Make your residence physically secure and help your family develop good security habits in order to intelligently screen all persons entering your home.

By making it difficult, time consuming, visible, and noisy for an intruder to break into your home, you will be deterring attempts to do so and will be giving yourself sufficient warning and more time to react appropriately.

Contact your local law enforcement agency and ask its crime prevention officer to perform a security survey at your residence. By using a checklist like the one below, you can greatly increase the security and safety of your family and property.

Physical Security

• Outside Doors – All doors leading to living areas from the outside, garage, basement, etc., should be of solid construction with secure hinges and peephole viewers.
• Locks – All outside doors should be locked at all times with double cylinder deadbolt locks. Keys should be left in every inside lock while the house is occupied to allow for emergency escape, except when the key might be reached from the outside by breaking glass.
• Sliding Glass Doors – A pin through the frame and a rod laid in the track will prevent sliding doors from being opened from the outside.
• Garage Door – Lock your garage door to deny access to your living area through your garage.
• Keys – Do not leave a key hidden outside your door or give your house keys to a parking attendant or anyone else you do not fully trust. If you lose your keys, or are not sure who might have a key, change the locks or have them re-keyed.
• Lights – Good visibility at night with adequate lighting should be maintained around all outside entrances, hallways, driveways, etc. Light timers can be used to control lights inside your residence while you are away.
• Landscaping – Visibility should be maintained around entrances. Landscaping should not allow easy access to upper levels or provide hiding places for assailants.
• Alarms – As added protection, you may want to install intrusion alarms or keep a dog to help warn you of a prowler.

Security Habits at Home

All the security devises in the world will not keep you safe if you do not make a habit of using them. Healthy caution must become a habit.

• Always respond to the doorbell or the phone; otherwise, a potential burglar may think the home is unoccupied and break in. When you answer, never let the caller know that you are home alone. Give him the impression that someone else is in the house with you.
• Always check through the peephole viewer to see who is outside your door. Never open your door to anyone you do not know and fully trust.
• In the case of service and repair men, verify their identities and purposes with their dispatchers before you open the door. If you decide to allow them to enter, arrange to either have a friend or neighbor there with you or monitoring you with periodic phone calls. Make these precautions obvious.
• If someone you do not fully trust asks to make an emergency phone call, don’t open the door. Make the call for them.
• Be careful about allowing children to answer the door, because they are less cautious. Begin reinforcing good security habits at an early age.
• Be careful about giving out information concerning yourself or where you live, either in person, by mail or over the phone.
• Keep emergency phone numbers posted near your phones.
• When returning home, make sure that you are not being followed. Be alert for anyone who may be waiting for you to unlock your door so that they can force their way in. Have your keys ready before you get to your door so that you can enter as quickly as possible.
• When returning home, if you have any reason to believe that an unauthorized entry has been made while you were always, go to a safe place immediately, such as a neighbor’s house, and get help before you return.
• Plan your fastest escape routes out of your house in case you ever have to exit quickly.
• If you find yourself trapped in your house, apartment, or any other building and you must yell for help, you may want to yell "Fire!" This will often get a better response. Don’t hesitate to throw something through a window or cause noise in any other way that might bring attention to your plight.
• If you live in an apartment complex, be especially cautious of laundry rooms, parking lots, or any other isolated areas. Insist that those areas are well-lighted, and try to use these areas only in the company of other trusted individuals.
• Remember that there is strength in numbers. Join with your neighbors in an effort to watch out for each other and make your home and families safer against criminal threats of all types.

Prevention While Driving

The next most common places for an assault to take place is on a road or highway. Perhaps this is because a vehicle provides the assailant with privacy and mobility.

• Park in well-lighted, well-traveled areas. Remember where you parked so you will not have to search for your car. Ask for an escort to your car if you feel at risk.
• Keep your car doors locked and windows rolled up at all times, especially while you are in it, but be aware that windows can easily be broken out by any determined attacker.
• Have your keys ready so that you can enter your car as quickly as possible, and lock the door.
• Before entering your car, visually check inside, under and around it to ensure no one is hidden.
• If you find anything wrong with your car, go back to the safety of the building and get help. Be cautious of anyone who might be standing by or offering assistance with your car. He may have sabotaged it in the first place.
• Keep your car in good running condition with at least a quarter tank of gas at all times. Locking gas caps and inside hood releases will help deter sabotage attempts.
• Keep some money hidden in your car in case you ever need it to take a cab, or for some other unexpected problem.
• Learn how to change a flat tire, so you won’t have to sit stranded. If you have a flat tire in an unsafe place, you can usually continue driving at a reduced speed until you get to a safe place to stop.
• If your car breaks down, here is one possible option that you might consider, depending upon the circumstances: raise the hood and remain in your car with the windows rolled up and the doors locked. Display a large "CALL POLICE" sign if you have one. If someone stops, ask them, through the window, to call the police or a towing service.
• Do not stop to help other motorists, but rather call help for them at your earliest convenience.
• If you are summoned to stop by a vehicle with a blue light, in North Carolina you are legally required to do so immediately. However, if you have reason to believe that the vehicle may not be official, and you fear for your safety, you may want to carefully drive to the nearest safe place where there are lights and people before you stop. In North Carolina, unmarked police vehicles are required to sound their sirens as well as flash their blue-lights should they summon you to stop after dark.
• While driving or stopped at intersections, try to leave enough room between yourself and the vehicle in front of you to provide an escape route around it if necessary. If someone tries to enter your car and you cannot immediately move, then honk the horn, yell and attract attention. If the attacker gets in, throw out the keys and get out immediately.
• If you are being followed or harassed, drive to the nearest safe place where there are people.
• Attackers have been known to cause accidents in order to get to victims. If you are involved in an accident in an isolated place, you may want to immediately drive to the nearest safe place and call the police rather than remain there at risk. If you can safely do so, inform the other driver before you leave. After you have notified the police, meet them back at the scene.

Prevention in Other Situations

Crime can take place in other places. Be particularly wary of any situations where you might find yourself in isolation with males that you do not know and fully trust.

• Stay alert to what is going on around you. Act immediately to remove yourself from any potentially dangerous situation.
• Walk briskly. Act assertively. Know where you are going. Don’t give off signs of helplessness or confusion.
• Be cautious with anyone who gives you undue attention, asks for directions, or in any other way tries to get too close. This includes someone offering help.
• Take friends or escorts with you to avoid being in isolated situations that might be risky.
• Don’t hitchhike or give rides to hitchhikers. If you find it necessary to accept a ride with, or give a ride to someone whom you are not sure you can fully trust, have someone you do trust monitor your departure and arrival.
• Get on and off buses in well-lighted areas. Sit near the driver if possible.
• Ask anyone giving you a ride to wait until you have safely entered your building.
• Be cautions when using elevators. Stand near the buttons and get off immediately if you are suspicious of other occupants.
• Both baby-sitters and those employing baby-sitters should obtain references and use caution.

The Attack

An assailant must overpower his victim and maintain control over her in order to carry through with his intended attack. This control can range from verbal coercion all the way to the use of a weapon and physical violence.

Your Critical Decisions

How good are your chances for stopping the attack without undue risk of physical harm? What are your changes to: escape, attract help, influence the assailant to stop by talking him out of it or through some other action on your part, or incapacitate the assailant?

These decisions should be based on the following three factors that should be analyzed by the victim according to the particular circumstances of the assault:

The Environment

Are you completely isolated, or is there help and safety nearby? If he is trying to abduct you from a semi-public place, he is telling you that he doesn’t feel safe enough to sexually assault you there. He wants to take you to a place that is safe for him and very unsafe for you.

The Victim’s Abilities

Every potential victim should try to give some forethought to what her physical, mental, and emotional capabilities really are in relation to dealing with an attack.

How capable are you of physical resistance? Can you run, scream, talk, fight or do something else that might effectively stop the attack?

How strong is your mental commitment to self-protection? If necessary, are you willing to cause grave injury to an assailant?

The Assailants’ Perceived Abilities and Motivations

Abilities: How much strength and power does he appear to have in relation to you? Is he large or small, fit or unfit, have a weapon or an accomplice?

Emotional state and motivations: Do you know him well, or is he a complete stranger? How much force is he using? Is he angry, nervous, hesitant, or calm? What kind of effect are your current actions (talking, etc.) having on him?

To Resist or Not – Only You Can Decide

After making an assessment based on the three factor above, the victim will have a much better chance of making a rational choice regarding resistance.

If the victim believes that by resisting she has a good change to avoid sexual assault and other grave injury, then she may decide that her best option is to choose resistance.

However, if the victim believes that resistance will not give her a good enough chance to avoid the assault without creating an undue risk of grave injury, she must choose not to do so. By choosing not to resists, she is in no way consenting but rather is enduring the assault in order to survive.

Even if the victim chooses, in her best interest, not to resist initially, she should constantly be looking for a good opportunity to reach safety and remove herself from the assailant’s control as soon as possible.

The Aftermath

Please understand that if a woman becomes a victim of sexual assault, regardless of whether or not she follows the suggestions given, she should not be blamed. No victim asks to be assaulted, wants to be assaulted, or deserves to be assaulted.

If you should become a victim of sexual assault or rape, you should do the following:

• Go to a safe place and call police at once.
• Preserve all physical evidence. Do not shower, bathe, or douche. Save the clothing you were wearing at the time of the assault. Do not disturb anything in the area where the assault occurred. This evidence is extremely important if your case goes to court. Call a friend, family member, and/or a Rape Crisis Companion to be with you for emotional support.
• Go to the hospital emergency room for medical care and evidence collection.
• Seek the counseling and information services of your local Rape Crisis Center. They can help you, your family, and associates deal with the aftermath of the assault. They understand the crisis of sexual assault, and they know how to help.
• Remember to report all sexual assaults or attempted assaults to the police.
• In North Carolina, medical and psychiatric fees can be provided at no cost to victims by North Carolina Victims Compensation.